Evasive Happiness
by unblunted
Summary: Happiness is something we all search for. People are only granted one chance at happiness. Or so that is conventional wisdom. This is a story of missing out on happiness, pain, and regaining that happiness. Inu/Kag, San/Mir. Complete.
1. Letting Go of the Past

Chapter 1: Letting Go of the Past

I have leapt over every hurdle that has come before me. Whether it is something as simple as living past childhood or something as difficult as finally killing Naraku, I have survived. It is about what Kagome would have called 3 in the afternoon. Now, I stand here in a meadow across from a person I had loved, Kikyo. My decision has been made up internally for some time now. All I have to do is vocalize my choice.

"I'm sorry Kikyo, I don't feel for you what I felt before." There, I have finally told her. It still hurts to see those eyes of hers, so dead, be able to feel anger at my words.

"So that's it, I mean nothing to you." That used to be enough to draw me back in, but not anymore. I may not always be the most selfish man, but I still want to live happily.

"I won't forget you, but I don't love you anymore. I don't want you to suffer through this life anymore." In a flash, I use my claws to destroy the claw body that was a host for that so-called Kikyo. While it was still painful, I can now move on with my life. It is time for me to go and find the one I do love now.


	2. Lost Happiness

Names for the Unnamed: Kagome's mother will be called Kaoru; Grandpa will be called Katashi for this story.

Chapter 2: Lost Happiness

The time has finally come. I have chosen Kagome. Kikyo is dead again. The last thing left to do is go through that damn well and tell Kagome. When I think about it, for having graduated that school thing of hers, she still stays in her time a lot. I wonder how often her mind drifts to me when she is over there. I know that is a selfish thought, but I hope she would at least think of me. Sango, Miroku, Kaede, and Shippo know my plans already so I simply tell them that I am going through the well.

I have just passed through the portal that is the well. Kagome is not at her house right now. Everyone seems almost solemn here right now. It is like something is wrong that I do not know about. I got here to the future at about 4 in the afternoon. According to the clock thing, it is now almost 6. Dinner is just about ready. I am sitting in the eating room listening to Souta yap. Finally after hours of just sitting here waiting, I smell here scent in the shrine courtyard.

I jump toward the window just in time to see Kagome and some boy I recognize but don't remember the name of. They're talking but due to the walls in Kagome's time, I can't hear a word they're saying. Imagine my surprise to see the woman I love grab that boy around the neck, pull him down, and kiss him. It only lasts a few seconds, but I will remember that moment forever. When they pull apart, they're both smiling. I simply turn around and walk back to the table for what will probably be my last meal in the future.

It is only a matter of minutes later that the door slides open. Then I hear Kagome call out a string of words that'll break my soul forever.

"Mama, Grandpa I'm getting married."


	3. Pain of Loss

Chapter 3: Pain of Loss

Those five simple words and the world ended for me. I don't know how long it took for Kagome to walk from the door to the eating room. The moment she walked in, she locked eyes with me and froze. At that very moment, Kaoru decides to put the food on the table. Everyone acts like all is right with the world. The meal is almost eerily quiet. It only lasts for about an hour and the conversation is non-existent.

"Thank you for the meal, I guess this is goodbye." I can't say much, an hour isn't enough to come close to numbing the pain. I am prepared to walk away forever when I hear her voice.

"Inuyasha, what right do you have to act so depressed, you love Kikyo." Well if that isn't a shot to the heart. I don't bother to turn around because I can't look at Kagome the same way anymore.

"Kikyo is dead Kagome. I put her back to rest before I came over here. I guess I should congratulate you on your marriage though." It was easier to ignore that idea when I hadn't yet said it. Now the entire blow is felt by me. After that is said, I am finally allowed to walk through the door.


	4. Inuyasha's First Day Back

Chapter 4: Inuyasha's First Day Back

You know, if I went to my friends, they would probably see this entire ordeal as my fault. So here I sit in a tree I spent a human lifetime sleeping upon. My mind is running a mile a minute right now. The main thought is that I don't have a reason to be alive anymore. Sango, Miroku, Shippo, and Kaede will probably all be happy for Kagome. Where do I go to now? I need to get away from this village where all I think of is her. I have bottled up my tears as I always do. I know that it will all come out eventually, hopefully in battle.

"What are you doing sitting in a tree little brother?" Sometimes the guy just scares the crap out of you. Not by being able to beat me, but he just sneaks up on you. I am personally glad that we made an alliance during the battle with Naraku. I am also glad that he knows the issue so I actually have someone to vent to. It is something that I missed over the years to have someone act as a brother.

"I went through the well." I know I haven't revealed everything but he needs to ask to get a deeper response.

"Then why are you up here alone?" Ahh, now that is a question that I will answer. Perhaps I should make him work for it.

"She's getting married."

"Yeah then why isn't she here?"

"Because she isn't getting married to me."


	5. Public Announcement

Chapter 5: Public Announcement

The conversation was basic between me and Sesshomaru from then on. A decision has been made by me now. I am going to go to the western lands. I will continue to be a fighter, but this time I will do it for me. I have actually decided to help with the military in the western lands. From there, I will work up to earn my spot as a member of my family.

Sesshomaru has since left. I smell something I do not expect. Although part of me suspected that she would return. I guess it is time for me to make my announcement to my friends and Kagome. I hop down from the tree I was sitting in since Sesshomaru left. I run to Kaede's hut just in time to hear Kagome's voice.

"I have an announcement to make."

"I guess I have one as well." Kagome jumps not having realized that I was there. "I guess that you can go first though."

"Alright, Sango, Miroku, Kaede, Shippou, I'm getting married." The entire hut is quiet as everyone except Kagome looks at me. I can see the surprise in their eyes. Nobody says anything though.

"I guess it's my turn." I am still hiding my pain so that they cannot see. "I have decided to leave for the western lands that Sesshomaru rules." I guess that confirmed things for them. "I am leaving immediately; I only stayed long enough to tell you guys. Bye"


	6. Questions and Departures

Chapter 6: Questions and Departures

As I am walking out of the village, Miroku comes running up to me. I know he wants answers and I will not talk in front of everyone. We keep walking until we came to a clearing. I know Sesshomaru is watching, but he can wait a few minutes.

"Inuyasha, what happened?"

"Kikyo is dead. I put her back to rest before going to tell Kagome that I love her. I arrive at her time and a while later her and I guess her future husband come up to the house. He leaves right away so she can tell her family. She already told you she is getting married so just go back to the hut and celebrate with everyone else."

"Inuyasha, what's going to happen to you?" At least I have one friend who is worried enough about me.

"I am leaving as I said before. Just send me an invite so I can be at your wedding Miroku, once you ask Sango." He looks surprised when I say that. I know he is going to ask her soon though. "Anyways it's time for me to leave."

I turn around and leave the clearing; I know Sesshomaru is following behind me. It is time for me to find a place in this world meant for me. Hopefully, I can do that at Sesshomaru's castle.


	7. Arrival at the Castle

A/N: These next few chapters will consist of Inuyasha and his time apart from Kagome. Upon her return, you will have her experiences in flashbacks. These next few chapters will be painful. Also, there will be very little dialogue. These chapters are Inuyasha's thoughts. Oh and as for ages, just advance this story three years past the start of the manga. This would have put Kagome at legal marital age in America and make the pain more realistic in my mind.

Chapter 7: Arrival at the Castle

If I expected a warm welcome upon arriving at the castle, I was sorely mistaken. It was not an easy adjustment. This was my home now. It was not somewhere I wanted to be, but where else could I go and not be reminded of her. I don't think I will be able to escape the pain she inflicted upon me.

Now I sit here, in this dark room. There is nothing for me here either. There was nothing for me at Kaede's village and there is nothing here. I don't know how I am supposed to continue my life when the reason I have been alive for years now years now is happy 500 years away from me.

Nobody has come into my room yet today. I'm somewhat glad for that. The problem, all I have done for the past few hours is staring at my sword. Some might find this odd, but when put through pain, maybe the sword is a way out.


	8. Wedding

A/N: Yes Kagome has told Houjo about the Feudal Era and demons. This didn't happen in the manga, but that's why it's my story. Yes this will be split in two chapters.

Chapter 8: Wedding

About a month after my arrival at the castle, I received a message from Miroku and Sango that their wedding would take place upon my arrival at the village. I know that Kagome has succeeded in bringing her fiancée to this time. While I'm happy for Miroku and Sango, I don't want to deal with that issue. I must go to the village because I promised Miroku that I would be there for his wedding.

Upon arrival at the village, Sango runs to greet me. I know that Miroku hasn't yet noticed my presence. As for Kagome, I doubt she would even care that I came at all. Sango tells me that the wedding will take place tomorrow since they were waiting for me. She also told me that Kagome has been angry about having to wait.

It's time for the wedding. Miroku is in the process of reciting the words of commitment right now. The ceremony is almost over. Kaede is presiding over the ceremony, which is held at Kikyo's shrine.

Continued in Chapter 9


	9. Attack after the Wedding

A/N: I got queasy writing this chapter. Kagome will be way out of character on this chapter. She will have a lot of work to do upon her return. This will be her last chapter that we see her in for a while.

Chapter 9: Attack after the Wedding

Finally, the festivities have begun. The entire village is present.

"I'm sorry if this is painful to you." Miroku walks up behind me. I know what he is talking about automatically. It seems some people really are meant to be alone.

Suddenly a roar is heard outside the village. A large oni springs out of the forest into the center of the village. Just as he lands, Kagome screams her fiancée's name. I realize immediately that this means he is down in the village within striking range of the oni. Without a thought, I jump into the village to see her fiancée cornered by the oni. The oni strikes down at him and I jump in front of the strike. I try to deflect it but am too slow.

Right after I get hit, Sango destroys the oni. Kagome runs over and hugs her fiancée, asking if he is okay. Sango, after destroying the oni, runs over to check on Kagome and her fiancée. Finally, after minutes go by checking on a person who was never even hit, Sango comes over to check on me. This whole day is like salt in a wound. I'm sure I can forgive Sango, but Kagome hasn't even thanked me for saving her fiancée. This is the last time I see her for a few years.


	10. Successful Suicide

A/N: Yes, Inuyasha does manage to kill himself. Yes, he will be alive when Kagome returns to the past. Remember Sesshomaru has a sword with certain redeeming qualities. This part of the story will take three chapters: the suicide (1) and the revival (2). Also this is a painful story, if suicide and depression offend you, don't read it.

Chapter 10: Successful Suicide

Upon arrival back at the castle after the wedding, I was treated to the token scorn I have felt since my original entrance. Even after a month, I feel no more at home here than I do anywhere else. I had attempted to explain things to Kaede hoping for advice. She told me that I would be allowed in the village whenever I want, but I don't want that place of nightmares anymore.

I have been back for a couple of days and am already being threatened. I have resigned myself to my quarters for the time being. Yet again, all I have time for is inspection of a sharp object which conveniently is strapped to my hip. I have the sword out of its sheath right now looking at the sharp edge of the sword. I have come to a decision, since I'm a burden to everyone, I will no longer burden people.

I grab the hilt of my sword and turn the edge to point in toward my stomach. With one smooth jab I push it into my diaphragm just below my ribs. Now it's only a matter of time before life saps away.


	11. Revival Part 1

A/N: Oh and yes I suppose I should say I welcome reviews of all kinds, don't make the criticism too harsh and make sure they talk about the story, no personal attacks. Thank you to all who have and shall review.

Chapter 11: Revival (Part 1)

I awoke surprisingly. I had passed out and thought myself dead. I even saw my mother for the first time in decades. Why am I back in this hell? I was dead. I don't belong in this world. Suddenly the door opens and Sesshomaru walks into the room. Suddenly it all makes sense. I did die, but I was brought back.

I understand that I'm not capable to move right now. It is too painful to even think about movements. Even the tiniest of twitches seems to hurt. I must have been a ways along in death if revival hurts this much.

"Why did you attempt to kill yourself?" I knew this was coming.

"Why did you bother to revive me?" Depression is an ugly symptom. Just one of the few things she left behind when she left.

"You promised to come here and help with the kingdom."

"Haven't you realized yet that they don't want me here?" He doesn't seem affected, but when does he ever seem affected by anything?

"Do you think they want me here? All I am to most of them is an oppressor." I guess this means that they don't hate me simply because of what I am.

"How long was I dead for before you revived me?"


	12. Revival Part 2

Chapter 12: Revival (Part 2)

Previously: "How long was I dead for before you revived me?" (Just so you know where I'm starting from)

"You were found dead in your quarters after lunch. When did you kill yourself?"

"Right after breakfast, I must have been dead for at least a few hours then."

Makes sense considering the pain I'm feeling. Ignoring Sesshomaru, I look out the window of the room I'm in currently. I recognize this room as one of the sick quarters. I must have been brought here upon revival so they could help with the pain. Pulling a soul that was so far along in death is obviously painful.

"So you plan to use death to escape your promises?" This surprises me to hear him say. He must be talking about my agreement to help with his military. Sesshomaru has always been a selfish person. The only reason I'm probably allowed here is because he wants my help.

"I guess I don't have any right to do I, since if I do try to escape you'll just keep bringing me back." After that, Sesshomaru leaves the room, I hear him order that I be kept under guard so that I don't try to kill myself again. It took me all of a week to get out of that sick quarter bed.


	13. Reasons to Live

A/N: For reasons of being a reminder of Kagome, Shippou and Inuyasha have limited contact. He is living with Miroku and Sango and will be mentioned sparingly. These next chapters are done quickly; I've discovered that my style is becoming too slow. I need to get to Kagome's return.

Chapter 13: Reasons to Live

The past few years, I had one reason to live. This goal was above the quest for the jewel. It was above destroying Naraku. It was above Kikyou. My reason to live for the past few years was simple: Kagome. The greatest adjustment I have to make is living a life, not only where I don't love her, but one where I don't even have contact with her. My life, over the past few months has fallen apart. I suppose that after months of mourning, maybe it's time to move on past Kagome.

I have, since my trip to the sick bay, begun to work in and with the military. I'm currently one of the most experienced and knowledgeable fighters in the military. I fully expect to be put into command of a unit in the military soon because people in this military can learn something from me. Maybe constant fighting is my calling. I've been fighting for years now. Maybe that's what I can do for the rest of my life.

Love be damned, I'm going to move onward. I'm going to live my life according to my rules and there isn't a person alive who can change that. Kagome made her choice and from here on out, her life doesn't affect me. With that in mind, I'm going to live. I may not ever be completely happy, but there is a life for me. I have a reason to live.


	14. Military Career of Inuyasha

A/N: This chapter involves Inuyasha's climb in military. Last chapter he was a warrior. He will move up. Next chapter completes this one. Some of these chapters happen simultaneously but the topics don't run together coherently to form a single chapter. This entry is spaced out to show advancement of time.

Chapter 14: Military Career of Inuyasha

I've been a member of the military of the western lands for three months now. It's been three months since I left the sick bay. I still think about Kagome, but I've come to realize that I don't need her. I'm now commander of a specialized unit of the army. We do everything. We are spies. We are the front line. We are one of the main components to the military. I already know that I'm a mere few days from being made captain of a larger contingent of men.

It's a month since I've been made captain of a collection of units. Our job is less simple than being the front line specialists. Our armies have started using a long distance attack. Archery has been common on the island for countless decades, but demons don't use them usually. I've been assigned to this militaries first archery division. Few demons have the knowledge of how to shot them. Due to Kagome, I've learned a little about archery. I think about her more and more seldom as time passes.

I am now one of the few generals of the army. Though I still report directly to Sesshomaru, I have no other commander. My orders, at the castle, are to be followed as if they are Sesshomaru's orders. I've discovered my inheritance states that if I achieve enough advancement, I will gain status of lord since I'm part of a noble family. Maybe now my struggles have ended.


	15. Lord Inuyasha

A/N: Kagome returns in the next chapter. From there, the story truly begins. I need some advice from readers. Should Kagome return to the past with any children or expectant children (specify which if yes)? Should Sango and Miroku have children? I will decide pending your reviews and responses. It has been 3 years since Kagome's departure. Kaede died a year after the departure. Kagome would be 21, as she was 18 when she left (read the A/N at the start of chapter 7)

Chapter 15: Lord Inuyasha

I have accomplished the feats required in my inheritance. I'm now the second Lord of the Western Lands. My commands are to be accepted across the entire western land. If I request something of demons, it is to be done. I have the ability to set up negotiation. I am not allowed to declare war or peace, but I may be the ambassador. I have almost all the same amount of sway as Sesshomaru.

Over the past three years, I have accomplished much. I have put Kagome as far out of my mind as possible. I have become a demon lord, even as a hanyou. As such, I now show the proof of my bloodline. Two straight red stripes adorn my cheeks. The same stripes as my demon blood, except not jagged. These stripes scared Sango and Miroku, since they're human and can't smell when demon blood takes control. I'm almost as controlled and unflappable as Sesshomaru.

I'm currently on patrol. I'm headed toward the town that I almost lived in 3 years ago. This town is the home of Sango and Miroku. It's the gravesite of Kikyou and Kaede, who died almost 2 years ago, a year after Kagome left. Miroku defends the village now. I'm going to surprise Sango and Miroku.


	16. Ghosts from the Past

A/N: Ok I have surrendered enough of my precious time in waiting for response to questions posted in chapter 15. Since my story is only good enough to be liked by one person, I will continue writing this story for my only reviewer. If you have an opinion, post it. I absolutely despise people who decide not to post a response simply because they think it won't have an impact. The question will be valid until a few chapters because this is the return to the village of Inuyasha, then some flashbacks of Kagome. The question is if Kagome should have children. I have already decided to have children for Miroku and Sango.

Chapter 16: Ghosts from the Past

I'm running through the forest just outside of the village I spent three years helping to defend. It's in my territory now. I haven't sent correspondence to the village because I want to surprise Sango and Miroku. I pass by the very tree in which I spent 50 years asleep. Of course, betrayal and pain is a common event for me. I'm done sticking my neck out and caring about others. I will take care of my land.

I know exactly which hut I'm heading to. There is no reason to bother anyone else when I'm only looking for Sango or Miroku. I walk up to the hut. I never knock on this hut during the day. I, like all the villagers, have an open invitation to enter the hut. I hadn't even noticed the newest hut in the village. I walk into the hut.

It's official, I'm ready to run. It's the same person who abandoned me three years ago. The cause of pain that has haunted me since the day she left.

"I thought you guys would be out all morning." She is looking the other way preparing lunch for Miroku and Sango. She thinks I'm one of them.

"What are you doing here?" She jumps as she realizes that I'm not Sango or Miroku. She turns from the food she is preparing. Her eyes widen as she looks at me.

"Inuyasha." That's all I give her time to say as I run out of the hut.


	17. Thoughts in a Tree

Chapter 17: Thoughts in a Tree

I know that I cannot leave the area without at least speaking to Miroku and Sango. I may not like the fact that Kagome is here, but it won't dictate my actions in respect to my friends. Even still, I'm not planning on making myself confront Kagome. She is here, but that doesn't mean I have to deal with her. As I sit in this tree, the same one I spent fifty years on, I'm deciding what I should do. I've been here for a few hours now. I can now smell Miroku approaching my tree.

"I was told you were in the area."

"Why is she here Miroku?" I don't tolerate small talk when important issues are present.

"She has nowhere else to go."

"She should be in her time with her husband." What does he think this is? It is ridiculous that she even thinks herself welcome here. "Why do you welcome her here? You know what has happened since she left."

"It wasn't my choice to welcome her here. She may be Sango's and my friend but that doesn't excuse what she put you through. Sango, however, is more forgiving than me and offered her a place to stay. As for her time, it isn't really safe for her to go back there."

"I should have been informed of this. After all that happened upon my departure, you and Sango should have found a way to tell me. How long has she been here?"

"She just arrived a few days ago. Since Sango offered our home, you will have to talk to Kagome eventually. The only other option is to start ignoring Sango, Shippou, and myself. You can come to our home whenever you're ready." Miroku turns and walks away.


	18. Food before the Fight

A/N: I stated in chapter 16 that I had decided upon Sango and Miroku's children. I wasn't lying. I decided that they shall have three children. The eldest are twin girls named Kaiya and Miaka. The youngest is a boy named Kenta. If you review and you want Kagome to have children, give me some suggestions for names. I want my reviewers to have some impact on the story. Also, if you have any suggestions aside from chapter length, I will take them into consideration.

Chapter 18: Food before the Fight

I was left in my tree for a few hours. It is now dinnertime. I needed the time to collect my thoughts. How exactly does a person pick up a friendship with someone who abandoned them? It isn't my job to forgive her. Right now, I'm walking up the trail leading to Miroku's hut. I know that he's correct in his theory about the only way to avoid Kagome is to avoid Sango, Shippou, and Miroku. That doesn't mean that this confrontation will work how Kagome wants it to. We will do things my way. I'm through giving her leeway. I walk through the door to Miroku's hut. All eyes are on me.

"I want to eat, then Kagome and I have something to discuss." This leaves no room for argument. It is, as my right as lord, an order. A command which shall be heeded, the looks on my friends and Kagome's faces show they wish to dispute this command. "It's not up for debate. I've decided that this is the way it will be. If you don't like it, that's unfortunate."

Sango already had a place set for me to eat if I desired it. Even Sango's and Miroku's twin girls, Miaka and Kaiya, can feel the tension in the room. As the meal comes to a close, I have decided that it's time.

"Kagome we'll have our discussion now."


	19. Questions

A/N: Just so you know, the question of Kagome's possible children is still up for debate. Thus far, I have not received any endorsement that says I should put children in the story. If your opinion differs, post it or it will be ignored. Also, I apologize if my statements may disagree with yours, but this is my story. If you don't like how I say things, don't read. Also, Inuyasha is intelligent in my stories. Some stories make him sound like he can't form intelligent thoughts.

Chapter 19: Questions

I lead Kagome away from the hut. She will follow or I will make her follow. Now is not the time for immaturity which Kagome can sometimes show. I lead her along the path out of the village. We pass the tree and well. I know that in the past, I spent my time thinking at the tree, but so did Kagome. When she decided to leave three years ago, going to the tree to think became less desirable because it still held memories of her. I lead her to the exact clearing I had my last conversation with Kikyou in three years ago.

"Why did you return here?" It isn't time for small talk. I want answers and she will provide them. I no longer enjoy frivolous chatter.

"I choose to return after some problems I had with Houjo." What a shock. She ran away when things got complicated.

"And you think that it's okay for you to return after what pain you choose to put me through."

"What makes you think that you can dictate my actions? I wasn't even thinking about you when I choose to come back."

"Obviously you weren't thinking about me when you left in the first place. Your return shows that you are obviously to shallow of a person to give any great importance to the meaning of what relationship you had with that human you married."

"You don't even know the reasons why I left but you assume to judge me."

"Fine if you think it is beyond my comprehension, then enlighten me."


	20. Reason One

A/N: As the title suggests, the following reason is only the first. Kagome's home life in the future will not be pleasant. It will be a sort of punishment for leaving the past. I will not go into gory detail so don't expect blood to be shown or more than rape to be mentioned. Don't expect me to go into detail for rape. In the next chapter, I will go through the worst of the beatings just to show what daily life was like.

Chapter 20: Reason One

When Kagome started talking, I figured it would be some selfish reason that would drive them apart. Something simple like him working too much to spend sufficient time with her. It wasn't what I expected. When she told me that the very day they returned from their post wedding celebration that he started violent tendencies. That he became increasingly violent daily, I was definitely surprised. I did not expect such things were possible between two people who had undergone the marriage ceremony. Something that is blessed and consecrated to be sacred should not be tainted. I feel a small morsel of pity as she told me about her former husband's actions. However, what she did three years ago is inexcusable.

I'm back at my tree considering that maybe, even though I despise it, that Kagome came here for sanctuary. I will find out exactly what caused the falling out between Kagome and her husband. From there, I will decide if she is allowed to stay. I am the lord of these lands. It is up to me to determine if she is being honest or deceitful. To do this, I'll return to a place I promised never to set foot again. I must talk to Kagome's mother. I have no choice but to return to the future.


	21. The Future

A/N: I have decided upon what I shall do with Kagome having a child. The question is no longer disputable.

Chapter 21: The Future

I'm standing at the door to the house ready to walk in. It's time for me to get some answers. That kid, Souta should be at school. Katashi (read the A/N at beginning of chapter 2 if you don't know who that is) is outside working at the shrine. Kaoru should be inside if my nose isn't lying. I walk through the door. Although I hadn't used it in a while, Kaoru told me I am welcome whenever I wish to come. I walk into the kitchen to see her at the table. She hasn't noticed me.

"We need to talk." She turns and looks at me at that instant. I can tell that she's surprised that I'm here.

"What do we need to talk about?"

"I talked to Kagome earlier about her return to my time. I need to know exactly what happened between her and that man she married." I didn't feel the need to tell her what exactly would happen if Kagome's words were false or the reason wasn't sufficient for me to allow her to stay. "Tell me what happened upon her return here."

"You should sit, that will take some time."


	22. Abuse Unveiled

A/N: Chapter 23 is already in the works. It should be out in less than an hour. I type really fast and make up the story as I go to give myself freedom.

Chapter 22: Abuse Unveiled

"Just so you know, Inuyasha, I don't know everything that happened between Kagome and Houjo. The only times I know about are the ones which involved the hospital."

"That's fine. I need to know the severity of what Kagome experienced. The most traumatic experiences are suggested."

"Well the first experience would have been about a month after the wedding. When we first went to the wedding, Kagome attempted to brush it off as being her own fault. After the divorce however, Kagome told us that Houjo came home. She was cooking dinner so she wasn't looking at him. Houjo apparently hit her a few times with his fist and a few times with the frying pan she was using to cook dinner. She stayed at the hospital for a week before she regained consciousness. That was the first time I suspected something wrong in the marriage. I tried to get Kagome to tell me more on what happened, but she refused."

"Was she hospitalized often?"

"She was hospitalized quite a bit, but the most were during her pregnancy."


	23. What Baby?

Chapter 23: What Baby?

"What do you mean pregnancy? There wasn't any child with her when we were in my time. I ate with her, Miroku, Sango, and their family. There was never any child that I didn't know."

"There wouldn't have been any child there. As I said earlier, most of her hospital visits came at that time. Honestly, I don't think Houjo wanted to be a father at the time. His abuse picked up. The child was a stillborn. He wasn't alive. I thought that would have been enough to make Kagome leave, but it wasn't."

"You mean to tell me that Houjo killed his own pup? What kind of person could even attempt to do such a thing?"

"To be honest, I don't know what kind of person could do such a thing. Abusing his wife is bad enough, but to kill his own child is one of the worst things he could have done."

"Alright I guess that I now have enough information to make my decision. Is there anything else I should know before talking to Kagome about this again?"

"Yeah I think you should know the reason Kagome left and what Houjo said after the divorce."

"You mean it went farther than what you just told me?"

"Yeah Kagome took it for a while, but after some time, she left him."


	24. Marriage Ended

A/N: One of my reviews recently has mentioned Inuyasha being angry about the pregnancy and Houjo's treatment of Kagome. Remember, in this story Inuyasha has already accepted Kagome's decision by this time. That is why he seems so calm despite everything.

Chapter 24: Ended Marriage

"Took it. Do you mean to tell me that Kagome allowed him to harm her?"

"That's exactly how I took. She told me while the divorce was going on that she took it because of how she treated you."

"That's all well and good, what made her finally leave him though?"

"He invited some of his friends over to participate whether Kagome liked it or not."

"So Houjo offered his friends a chance to bed Kagome?"

"Exactly, Kagome found out before they got home and left the house. She came here and told me everything that had happened while they were married. She filed for divorce the next day."

"Alright and what did Houjo say after the divorce?"

"He told her that he was going to kill her. He made sure to wait until only Kagome and I could hear it though. She needs to stay away from this time all together."


	25. Decision

Chapter 25: Decision

After my time spent talking with Kaoru, I spent a little time deliberating. I know that it is entirely possible for Kagome to survive in another village. She could become a priestess and protect any number of villages. However, this would anger both her and Sango. Furthermore, she came back not only for her own safety; Kagome is simply comfortable with Sango. The problem is the fact that while I know Miroku to be loyal, Kagome is a non-widowed female living with Miroku's family. Furthermore, she isn't a relative of either Sango or Miroku. She can't stay in the same house in my opinion. I have made my decision. I'm now heading to Sango and Miroku's hut.

"I have made my decision. Listen carefully and question later. I've decided that Kagome can stay in this village under one condition."

"Okay and what condition is that." Well at least Sango is willing to listen.

"It's inappropriate for both a non-relative and a non-widow to live with you. Therefore, Kagome needs to have a hut constructed for her. It matters not if she comes to this hut in her free time. She isn't allowed to stay in this hut any longer."

"What do you mean? I have been staying here for almost a month already."

"The decision has been made; either accept my decision or leave."


	26. Necessary Discussions

Chapter 26: Necessary Discussions

The hut for Kagome has been under construction for a few days. I've decided that since I made the decision to have Kagome leave Sango and Miroku's home, I'll help build. Things between Kagome and I are still awkward at best. We have a plethora of problems to work through. For the sake of Sango and Miroku, it's necessary to work through some of them. I don't want to force Miroku or Sango to become mediators. Kagome and I are going to have a conversation that needs to take place.

"Kagome, there are still things I don't understand. What did I ever do to make you decide to leave and marry someone else?"

"It was my own insecurity. I thought that you wanted Kikyou and I was in the way."

"Why didn't you let me make that decision?"

"Because I thought you already had. It hurt because even while I was married to Houjo, I still loved you."

"Yeah, you can claim that all you want. The fact is that if that was true, my confession three years ago at your house about Kikyou would have caused some kind of reaction."


	27. Second Best

Chapter 27: Second Best

Previously: "Yeah, you can claim that all you want. The fact is that if that was true, my confession three years ago at your house about Kikyou would have caused some kind of reaction."

Presently: "Inuyasha, in truth I never really loved Houjo. He filled a space I wanted you to take but didn't think you ever would. Then the confession came after I had already accepted his proposal."

"Why do you care what he thinks? If you didn't love him, his opinion should have held less weight for you. Therefore, canceling the engagement shouldn't have been a problem."

"It's not that simple. I accepted second best because I thought that what I truly wanted was outside my grasp."

"And what about me; you made the decision for both of us and allowed me to spend three years without you. Why would you think you had all the answers?"

"Because if I didn't have to hear you say it, I could still hold onto the dream of you wanting me."

"I confirmed that dream. It was what I wanted too, but now you made a choice and I cannot simply erase three years of pain that you caused. We had our chance and you squandered it."


	28. Assumptions

A/N: I plan to have chapter 29 up on Monday. I might have more than one by then. I don't exactly work far ahead or plan it out. I just write with whatever emotions I have available.

Chapter 28: Assumptions

Previously: "I confirmed that dream. It was what I wanted too, but now you made a choice and I cannot simply erase three years of pain that you caused. We had our chance and you squandered it."

Presently: "Why do we only have one chance?"

"Because, Kagome, I don't trust you enough anymore to think that I can give you a chance and not end up hurt. What else do you expect me to think when I gave everything up for you and you took an easy out?"

"It wasn't an easy out. I waited for you to tell me what you wanted. I cannot help if I make an assumption based on your visible lack of interest. What would have made me want to stay and wait for nothing?"

"And you expected me to just abandon our quest to destroy Naraku and Kikyou for you. Did you want me to just forget everything else? You never gave me a chance to make my decision before you made it for me."

"You act like the decision hurt you so badly. You probably spent a few days and then got over it."


	29. Reality

Chapter 29: Reality

Previously: "You act like the decision hurt you so badly. You probably spent a few days and then got over it."

Presently: "Is that all you think I am? You think that I could spend a few days to stop loving you. Honestly I never have been able to stop no matter how badly I wanted to."

"Well it's probably the truth. How much time did you spend thinking about Kikyou after her death?"

"That's entirely different; I choose her at a time I didn't think I could have anyone else. I choose you when I knew better than that. I guess I was wrong to think that you would want to have stayed here with me. I didn't simply forget you. I died, not just emotionally, but physically. Sesshomaru had to revive me from the dead. Do you still think that I ever got over you?"

"Why didn't you ever clue me in about it?"

"I wanted it to be surprising but apparently I cannot do that and have it end beneficially for me."


	30. Second Chance

Chapter 30: Second Chance

Our discussion continued for a while longer. Kagome wants to try and build a relationship with me. I cannot even attempt to trust her. If I give her my heart again, I might never get it back. She thinks her pains in the future make up for what she did to me. The problem is that even though she didn't choose him for his abuse, she still choose Houjo. I told her that the best she can hope for is if she's willing to wait for me. I need time to get past her marriage, her return, and move on if I can. I also told her that while I hope for the best for her, I won't allow myself to be hurt again.

I'm back at my tree thinking about the past few days. Kagome has returned. Is that exactly a good thing though? Do I truly even want her here? I have much to think about. Rash action, I've learned, is usually punished. I need to take time and make intelligent decisions. I may seem selfish for denying someone I loved and still love happiness, but what about my own happiness? She ignored me for someone else three years ago.


	31. Long Road

Chapter 31: Long Road

The tree, I've discovered, is an excellent place to make decisions. As such, I've made one. The decision about how Kagome and I shall treat each other. I wouldn't really consider us on friendly terms per say. There is still a lot of anger and pain between us. We've done too much to make each other upset. I will need time to forgive her. Maybe after that time is given, if she still desires it, we can work on anything more. I am headed to the hut to talk to Kagome.

"Kagome, I've made my decision. I believe we need to talk again." I say as I walk into the hut. Sango is there, but she isn't part of t he conversation. "Can you come with me outside?"

"Sure I've been waiting for your decision." I lead her away from Sango's hut and out to the tree.

"I know what you want now, but I doubt if I can give it to you. We have years of issues to get through before I can give you a chance again. It may be a long time to wait, but it's necessary. I have rules for how it will work if we try to forgive each other in time."

"Alright, I guess I understand that I hurt you three years ago and you do need time. What are the rules?"

"First off, neither of us will attempt to find a mate without our situation being resolved. If you mate with someone, I will ask you to leave the western lands. Second, under no circumstances should a male live with you or a female with me. That includes Shippou. Finally, if a male tries to court you, I will be informed. Same goes for me if a female attempts to get me to court."

"Alright I knew it would be a long road, but I can at least try."


	32. Problems to Fix

A/N: This chapter is done like a list. The next chapter will involve solving the problems. These thoughts are, obviously Inuyasha's. Review and guess where I'm going to go next.

Chapter 32: Problems to Fix

Trust is, and always will be, the first thing that is needed if you are to be even friends with someone. Kagome and myself, we don't have trust right now. That is the first thing that needs to be mended. How do you mend trust? You give it out and then test it. In the case of Kagome and me, the test will take time. We need one of the other men who attempted to court Kagome to come and try again. If she can refuse, trust grows. If she cannot refuse, trust dies.

Honesty is the next thing to test. The test for this is simple. We put rules in place, which both sides accept, and then see if we can follow those rules. If we can follow the rules, we're honest. If we fail, we're deceitful. We already have the rules in place. Kagome and I have both agreed to them. So we can test them soon.

The final test is the most extreme. Once upon a time, I would have sacrificed myself for Kagome and she would have done the same for me. Time and pain have separated us. To see if we still care enough to die for each other is the final test.


	33. Trust Tested

A/N: Sorry I haven't updated in a while. Between being tired of writing this story and not having a lot of time, I haven't given it much thought.

Chapter 33: Trust Tested

It's funny to think of all the different things that can happen on what begins as a normal day. It makes you wonder if there is such a thing as a normal day. What starts off as ordinary and boring ends up important. Well for Kagome and I, what became an important day started as ordinary. It was like every day, they spent the time in a semi-confused state involving love and anger. It was about 3 in the afternoon when the day became important. One of Kagome's former suitors came into the village. He claimed that he smelt her while hunting. Of course, Kagome doesn't know about my trust issues. However, this is perfect. Our trust is to be tested on Kouga.

"Kagome, I've missed you. You can come with me now and be my mate." It's time for decisions to be made. If Kagome agrees, then I leave her and Kouga alone. If she declines, I give her a little more trust. She looks to me for help.

"It's time you made this decision Kagome. Do you want Kouga or not?" After that, she looks back at Kouga. She understands now that if she wants to make that choice I won't stop her. It's all up to her.

"I'm sorry Kouga, but I don't want to be your mate." I didn't realize I was holding my breath until I let it out. Our first problem is now gone.


	34. Honesty

A/N: I'm not to sure how long I will continue with this story. I don't really have much patience for it anymore. I hardly get any reviews. The story is just losing interest to me. Until I decide, I will continue to update. Also, when I do decide, I will tell you what that decision is. If I continue, the end is near.

Chapter 34: Honesty

The rules that we set up are being carefully followed. As a lord, I've a large number of women, both human and demon, attempting to convince me to court them. I've told Kagome about each and every one of them. She also has a few males attempting to court her. I've been informed and she also told me that her response was a flat no. As far as I'm concerned, I am following the rules to the tee. Kagome has been doing her job as well. Shippo has been told that he is to live with Miroku and Sango. I truly believe that we're well on our way to getting where we both want to be.

As far as I'm concerned, this test has been passed many times over. The final test should be coming soon. I'm convinced that we will pass that test as well. Each of us seems to be committed to courting each other. It makes me glad to see that, while she could have taken the easy way out, Kagome stayed and tried to make it work between us. We just need one thing for Kagome to earn my acceptance.


	35. Final Test

A/N: Sorry this has taken so long. I wanted to make this test realistic. Let's be honest though, how often does Inuyasha get in danger really? The only times he really gets hurt is when he is protecting Kagome.

Chapter 35: Final Test

Three years ago, I would've been willing to die for Kagome. I almost did so for her husband all that time ago (chapter 9). The fact is, even after her engagement, I was still willing to go that far. Let's be honest though, that whole experience left me doubting if she even cared if I lived or died. She attempted to explain that problem by saying that if she checked on me; she wouldn't have been able to leave. That doesn't even seem feasible to me. In my opinion, she just needed a reason to excuse her behavior that day. I need to know though, is she still willing to put herself in danger for me.

Kagome and I are walking toward a clearing up ahead trying to figure out how we want our lives to go. It's not an easy thing to do, rebuilding after you completely tore something down. This occasion is taking all of my concentration. That's the only explanation I can come up with right now. My thoughts have invaded my head and clouded my senses. This is why I didn't notice the tiger demon until after his claws landed the first blow. I pull my sword, but my movement is slowed slightly by the claw wounds running down the left side of my back. The tiger turns and leaps at me again, I'm not fast enough to deflect it. I close my eyes in anticipation of another stab wound, when the scent of human blood reaches my nose. I open my eyes in time to see Kagome fall to the ground unconscious.


	36. Acceptance

A/N: Sorry this has taken a while. This is the last actual chapter. I will write in my next chapter my reasons for writing this. My computer has been in the shop for a while and I haven't had the opportunity to write until now. As far as the ending, I leave it up to you to decide what happens to them.

Chapter 36: Acceptance

Now that I know all I need, my decision has been made for me. As I sit here at Kagome's bed with her still unconscious, my thoughts are simple, as soon as she wakes up, we will prepare for a wedding. We have spent so much of our lives evading each other. Finally after four days of watching her lay there completely motionless, she stirs and I see her beautiful blue eyes open.

"I have your answer Kagome. For whether or not I will give you another chance. The answer came to me while waiting for you to awaken. Now is our chance to be happy together. There is no more concern about suitors as far as either of us is concerned."

"You mean it Inuyasha. This isn't just some thing you decided because of me getting stabbed is it?"

"No, we will be together from now until the end of time. I have always loved you, Kagome."


	37. Final Notes on Evasive Happiness

End Notes for Evasive Happiness

First off, life isn't made for us to know all the answers before the proper time. This story ends in an ambiguous way because we all have our own opinions on how it will end.

Next, my reason for writing this story is simple. I have seen so many stories where Inuyasha hurts Kagome and she goes back home. Then, Inuyasha somehow shows up in the future to try and make her his wife/mate. It is so repetitive. So I decided what if the opposite happened. Inuyasha despite all his faults only has one girl aside from Kagome interested in him. Every male on the planet is interested in Kagome seemingly. Why is Inuyasha the only one who can cause strain in their relationship? This story exists because I believe that a woman is capable of damaging a relationship just as easily as a man.

Finally, I want to thank all of the people who took time out of their lives to read this story. Furthermore, I want to thank all of those who reviewed. I didn't ask for them aside from opinions. Thank you for having the courtesy not to just say that I suck as a writer. This was my first story, and with how it went, possibly my last. I started off really writing and my passion for it dwindled fast. Thank you for sticking with it. If I do write anything more, I will post a note on this story to inform you.


	38. Authors Note: New Story

Author's Note: New Story

This note is set up simply for an idea I have for a new story. I have a guideline set up but I want to see what you think of it first. The story will be Sesshomaru and Kagome. Furthermore, Inuyasha will have a mate. This will be a response of sorts to all those anti-Inuyasha fics out there. I want people to realize that Inuyasha in the show has a tremendous amount of dignity and honor. Some authors make him seem like a villain as much as Naraku is. The story will be called Pain before Love. It will start out as a Sesshomaru and Kagome fic while also centering on Inuyasha's thoughts of it. Then I will have a time in which Inuyasha is gone, centering only on Sesshomaru and Kagome. Finally, Inuyasha will return, but he will not be alone. I think it is time to give Inuyasha the credit he deserves. Review on this story to tell me your thoughts.


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